1) Find places you go that you don’t have to pay into.
2) Bring in your own drink to the places that you find you don’t have to pay into.
3) Walk home, don’t get a taxi.
4) That’s right pack the umbrella, comfy shoes and snuggly jacket so the walk home is easy.
5) Have a CD party, get your mates to bring their CDs/iPods and listen to that album you just can’t afford but someone else could.
6) Stay in.
7) Drink soda water and lime, soft drinks, tap water.
8) Drink whatever you’re drinking very slowly.
9) Pretend you’re on the continent, go out late.
10) Get tanked up before you go out.
11) Start your own wine/beer/vodka appreciation society. Review the cheap drinks the media rarely gives space to.
12) Stage your own play/musical/dance extravaganza for your friends.
13) Buy drink in bulk, have a party and charge your mates for each drink – charge them more than it cost you.
14) Smoke rollies. Or feign quitting cigarettes and smoke other people’s cigarettes.
15) Claim there’s something wrong with your drink, after taking a healthy swig.
16) Invite your friends round for a party, and get them to pay the taxi fare.
17) Stay local. If you’re from the countryside go down the local in the next village/crossroads. If you’re from a village or town, frequent the local watering holes, don’t be hiring a minibus to the next town. If you’re from the suburbs of a city go to wherever is in walking distance. Save yourself the taxi fare/NightLink fare.
18) If you do get a taxi, cram as many as legally possible into it. Divide the fare equally.
19) You know the bank of mum and dad? Well remember when you were in your late teens they ran the taxi of mum and dad? Check if they’re open for business. There’s nothing a mammy likes better than knowing Junior gets home safe. Especially useful if mammy or daddy are Pioneers.
20) Never drink or drive. That’s right, don’t drink alcohol or drive a car and you’ll have a lot more money in your pocket alright.
Categories: Storytelling
